Ngendahimana who lives in Cyarukamba village, Munyiginya sector, Rwamagana District, says he did not provide security in his house because of the alcohol he had drunk.

“I was bad because I didn’t provide security due to the bottles of beer I was drinking.” She revealed.

His wife, Mrs. Mukankusi Josiane, said she was abused for a long time, and realized it after being trained.

She said; “we used to know that a woman belongs to home. But after God helped us by sending Rwanda Women’s Network they trained us and took us out of isolation and terror. Now, we’re happy, and we are safe and at peace.”

"You're a woman belonging at home. The husband has been taking all the money and buying beer. You and the children have been hungry for a day and night, and all he took, you have been getting together. Then when you would say something, he would say 'This is not your father's house, you will go to your father's house and rule there!' You see, we were subjected to physical and emotional abuse. (...) We came from far away," she added.

Bankrupt a business due to alcoholism and girls

Ngendahimana says the lack of security in his home has affected all family members; even his boutique has gone bankrupt.

“What I was doing stopped. (...) I was a businessman but I took all my money I sold into the bar, and I didn't give value to my money, this is the effect. My family is not living well, my children can't study, and I can't pay health insurance fees on time, it was a problem that disturbed me a lot,” he said.

Ngendahimana started selling boutiques with a capital of 500,000, but due to drinking, he realized that he had gone bankrupt.

He said, “Because of a disagreement with a woman, you go to a bar to drink a bottle and get drunk. You didn't recognize the way the money has gone, because at one time I spent more than 100 thousand, and it was not necessary. I live in a town, near to Karangara, when you see that girl, you can't let her! There was a lot of money spent. If start with 500 thousand and get to 100 thousand, it's a loss! "

He says that he would come home and be asked for money and the way he spent it, the wars have been started!" But now they say that they had a chance to change, and the family lives in peace.

 “What caused the war was that I was drunk. Because you are not a drunkard, there can't be a war. But now we had a chance… we participated in training that helped us get out of the conflict. Because the life we ​​lived in was very bad, we sat and jumped, the neighbors and the authorities were sad because they knew the life we ​​grew up in. They said 'In Ngendahimana's home crazy attacked them!” Ngendabimana stated.

Mrs. Mukankusi said that they once fed him, but he kicked them out. However, she emphasizes that her husband has now changed.

The conflict lasted six years. But when he compares it to the three years since the conflict ended, he regrets a lot, including the impact it has had on their children.

“But once we got to the training, things went well because we built a house with its kitchen. We have domestic animals, children are studying well, and others are doing business,” Ngendahimana added.

Ngendahimana and Mrs. Mukankusi testify that the security of their family has brought them prosperity and they have a good home where the family is safe, they are happy, and look good. They added the harvest was increased.

Ngendahimana asks other men, especially those who love to drink, to stop or drink less because alcohol can make a person lose control.

He said, "Drinking alcohol is unhealthy and contributes to men abusing women."