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Ese imyaka mumaranye ni yo yemeza ko mutazatandukana?
Uwajeneza Donatha
May 25, 2026 - 20:22
Ubushakashatsi bwerekana ko urukundo rusaba ibirenze igihe,mu buzima bw'abashakanye cyangwa abakundana kuko hari benshi bibaza niba imyaka bamaze babana ishobora kuba garanti y’uko batazatandukana. Hari abavuga bati "tumaze imyaka 10 turi kumwe, nta cyadutandukanya" abandi bakemeza ko iyo urukundo rumaze igihe rurerure ruba rwamaze gukomera.
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Ariko se koko imyaka mumaranye ni yo igena ko umubano uzaramba?
Abasesenguzi mu mibanire y’abashakanye bavuga ko igihe abantu bamaze babana gifite uruhare mu gukomeza kumenyerana no kubaka amateka ahuriweho, ariko ko kidahagije ngo cyonyine kirinde gutandukana.
Ubushakashatsi bwakozwe n’ikigo cy’Abanyamerika gikora ubushakashatsi ku muryango n’imibanire, "National Marriage Project", bwagaragaje ko hari abamarana imyaka irenga 20 cyangwa 30 ariko nyuma bakaza gutandukana bitewe n’ibibazo byagiye birundanywa imyaka myinshi batarabiganiriyeho.
Ubwo bushakashatsi bwerekana kandi ko impamvu zitera gutandukana akenshi atari ikibazo cy'imyaka myinshi babana, ahubwo ari ukubura ibiganiro byimbitse, kutizerana, gucana inyuma, ibibazo by’amafaranga, kutumva neza uwo mubana ndetse no kudafashanya mu rugo.
Abahanga mu by’imibanire bavuga ko hari abashobora kumarana imyaka ibiri gusa ariko bafite urukundo rukomeye, kumvikana no kubahana, kurusha abamaranye imyaka 15 ariko babana nk’abamenyeranye gusa.
Hari n’abavuga ko uko imyaka igenda ishira, ari ko abantu bamwe barekura kwita ku rukundo rwabo, ibiganiro bikagabanuka, gukundana bikaba ibisanzwe, buri wese akibanda ku nshingano, z'abana cyangwa akazi, maze umutima ugatangira kwigunga buhoro buhoro.
Umwe mu bajyanama b’ingo yavuze ko nta myaka yihariye yemeza ko abantu batazatandukana ahubwo ko icy’ingenzi ari uburyo bubaka umubano wabo wa buri munsi.
Yongeyeho kandi ko hari ingo zimara imyaka myinshi zibanye ariko zifite ibikomere byinshi bitavuwe, ku buryo igihe kigera ibintu bigaturika bagatandukana kandi abantu bakekaga ko bakomeye ko batatandukana.
Ubundi bushakashatsi bwashyizwe hanze n’ikigo "Institute for Family Studies" bwagaragaje ko abashakanye bakomeza kugirana ibiganiro bya buri munsi, gusangira ibibazo no gukomeza kwereka uwo babana ko akenewe, bafite amahirwe menshi yo kuramba mu mubano kurusha abishingikiriza gusa ku myaka bamaze babana.
Abaturage batandukanye bavuga ko urukundo rutarindwa n’igihe ahubwo rurindwa n’uburyo abantu bakomeza kurwitaho.
Umwe yagize ati: "Hari abamaranye imyaka 25 ariko batarebana akana ko mu jisho, abandi bamaranye imyaka itatu gusa ariko bakabana bafite amahoro n’ibiganiro."
Abahanga kandi bagaragaza ko abantu benshi bibeshya ko kumarana imyaka myinshi ari byo byonyine bituma umubano udasenyuka, nyamara buri munsi uba usaba kongera kubaka icyizere, kubahana no kwihanganirana.
Mu muco nyarwanda, kera wasangaga abantu bashyira imbere kwihanganirana no kurinda urugo rwabo, ariko muri iki gihe hari abavuga ko abantu batakigira umwanya wo gukemura ibibazo hakiri kare,ahubwo bakabireka bikaba byinshi kugeza igihe umwe ananiwe akarekura.
Nubwo nta mubare w’imyaka ushobora gutanga icyizere gihamye ko abantu batazatandukana, abasesenguzi bemeza ko umubano uramba ushingira ku bintu birimo: ibiganiro bihoraho, kubwizanya ukuri, kubahana, gukemura amakimbirane hakiri kare kandi neza, kwita ku wo bashakanye cyangwa bakundana, no gukomeza kwereka uwo mubana cyangwa mukundana ko agifite agaciro mu buzima bwawe.
Iyo ibyo bibuze,n’imyaka 30 ishobora kudahagarika gutandukana. Iyo bihari kandi, n’igihe gito gishobora kubyara umubano ukomeye kandi urambye.
By Diane Batsinda.
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