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"It robbed me of the name for which I fought," Munyaneza regrets the time spent in the conflict.
Uwajeneza Donatha
Jun 18, 2024 - 12:36
Munyaneza Vedaste, who lives in the Nyamirambo sector, Rugarama village, Riba village, says that he grew up striving to be a man and succeeded. However, he found himself in conflict with his wife, Mrs. Uwamahoro Sifa, because he listened to people who wanted to destroy their unity, causing him to disregard his wife's values.
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"I grew up as a young boy who striving to be a man, and I succeeded. However, I once fought with my wife. After reflecting on it, I realized that I went back to what I fought for. We resolved the conflict and now we live well together without any problems," he disclosed.
Munyaneza stated he spent a year in the conflict, but before that, he was living with his wife peacefully, which is why people started to gossip, and they found living in a conflict.
“It was long, it wasn't good! … It came because of bad people, because of the jealousy of people who are beaten our heads. You see that we are going to rent all around... because the place we rent is not good and you meet a lot of people who are not good and say that 'we are going to destroy their family' because they are not happy with what you are doing, " he noticed.
“I started as a man...there is no work I do not know how to do. I was a security guard and my wife worked in the company I worked for. I worked nights, she worked days. I would go back home and do the rest and I would do it when our neighbours were not happy about it, and said that I had been poisoned! The work is done by a woman, not by a man! Do you wash the children's clothes? Do you wash your woman's clothes? They ask, "Why do you fetch water?" They tried to make me understand that she had poisoned me, but I denied it. When I would leave work, they would say, "Your wife cheated on you." I would have checked and not seen it, but because of their many hurtful words, it became a problem!”
Munyaneza stated he was beating his wife and he wanted her to accept what was said but she said 'You want to kill me, but I won't accept what I didn't do!'
Mrs.Uwamahoro Sifa mentioned she had emerged from the conflict that hurt her a lot because their problem also reached RIB after she was seriously injured.
She said, "I was sick, he hurt me. But when we got there [RIB], they mediated between us, and it ended."
She says that even though it was caused by people if Munyaneza had listened to her and those who came to advise them, it would not have been a problem.
"He would come and they would pack him many words and then he try to convince me and you, the owner, are there. People came and talked to him, but he didn't understand them, so I said, ’Let me go to RIB, then tomorrow or the next day, if I have a problem, they will know what it was like," she disclosed.
She admits that her husband has become a problem, after being friends with the family, their pastor, and her brother come to give them advice but to no avail.
"The day I went to the training, I heard that they put us in families live in conflict, I was very sad, I said, 'God, I reached here!? ' because I didn't wish it, I went there without knowing if that conflict will end because according to those who came before them, and what they were conversing with us, I asked myself that others had more knowledge than the first! I tell them I don't expect anything, I say 'but let's try' but he decided to change himself!” she mentioned.
Mrs.Uwimana says that the lesson of understanding each other is what is missing in their home, causing conflict, and being trained by Aegis Trust was very useful. She added that prayer and humility are important in bringing about change in the family.
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